at random...11/30/2009

amanda grace - 7 news weekend midday in new england anchor.  she's becoming a most pleasant part of my weekend routine.  (35 points) 







mark margarit - mark does the weather for 7 news weekend midday in new england.  he walks and talks like a flight attendant.  seriously.  watch him and you will see what i mean.  he gives me a craving for a can of warm 7up and 3 nips of smirnoff. (-15 points)





sara underwood - her husband implied on his radio show that if sara had nicer "cans" she wouldn't be working weekends.

New England's Crappy News

Anchorman and I have been arguing over who has to watch the NECN broadcast. Since he has been spending so much time with the Golden Girls (including Ed Harding) of WCVB Channel 5, I take the assignment of watching New England's Cable News.  Its with this in mind that I watched almost a half hour of NECN New England Cable News and here are my thoughts.

Well its...hmmmm...Its pretty good for a high school new broadcast. But I suspect some of those kids are to old for high school.

NECN version of "Wu" is Kristy Lee and she's OK. Cute and friendly but uninteresting.

Karen Swensen is your typical generic morning show host. Bubbly, friendly, empty and forgettable.

 It is nice that they keep R.D. Sahl employed. I bet its difficult from keeping RD from wondering out of the building and getting lost. Maybe he can't remember his kids names anymore but he can still read a teleprompter.

steve burton - fashion plate for the blind

steve burton wore a powder blue suit (and vest!) on the wednesday evening newcast that needed to be seen to be believed.  i have never seen a suit as silly looking as this without first hearing the phrase "and the next pick in the nba draft is..."

Pray for Mojo

Evidently WBZ Channel 4 has given Jonathan Elias a new exciting segment designed pull in those important 65-85 year old lady and little girl babysitter demographics. Its called One Last Thing and airs each day just before the close of the 5:30 evening  report. In this segment Jonathan gets to relay an heartfelt emotional editorial to the audience about how to be good to each other and love everything like unicorns and rainbows. Today he talked about how scientific proof shows that being thankful can be good for your health. You live a longer happier life if you give thanks more than once a year. I'm thankful I don't believe bullshit like this. I'm sorry but, this emotional moment of "news" makes me feel like I'm on a first date and before the salad gets there she's telling me all about all the kids she wants to have and how her last boyfriend f-ed her over.

Jonathan, do you really write these or is there a team of little girls who do so for you? I believe the Simpson's called it "Bart's People" in the one where Homer gets Mojo, the helper monkey. It was a joke then and its a joke now. I bet your daughter and her friends are happy.

Holiday party, Booooo Yeah.

One of the topics of discussion at the Anchored penthouse is which station is going to have the best holiday party. So I'm going to think this through even if I think I already know.

WBZ Channel 4 - Most likely not the office blow with the accompanying inappropriate employee fraternization you want out of a holiday party. Since Randy Price got busted years ago driving the wrong way down Storrow Drive this party is a get-together and not a party. It will be at a function room at a local wedding hall or the back room at the Kawloon. On a fun scale probably a 5. It will be fine. But when Anchorman and I get there who do we hit on? If Sarah Wroblewski doesn't show then I'm taking my one hitter and calling a cab. I'll pull Anchorman away from Paula Ebben and go to the Tam.

WCVB Channel 5- We probably won't be there for very long because we will get there about 9:00 and the party will have ended at 8:30. The Golden Girls (including Ed Harding) need to get home, take their meds and sleep.

WHDH Channel 7- Now here is a party. I bet I could even get some ativan at this party. It will be some place good like Kings for a bowling party. Booze will flow like wine. Anchorman and I will sift through the wall of douchey sales guys to get to Anne Allred, Victoria Warren, Dylan Dryer or "Cupcake" Nicole Oliverio. I know we talk about how hot this "A" team of ass is but lets not forget about often overlooked Linda Ergas. She looks like she would kill and eat you after a mind blowing sexual encounter and all I can say is count me in. After the party is over we'd all get a cab back to Anne's or Dylan's place, dance and do bong hits until dawn. "Hey Anne you and Dyl want to get breakfast." I've always wanted to say that.

Fox 25- This will probably be a close second place to the Channel 7 party. Sarah Underwood would have a little to much to drink and start bad mouthing her husband Michael Felger from 98.5 The Sports Hub so he will have to take her home early. I would create a river of Captain and Diet cokes for Erin Hawksworth and Dianna Rocco. Anchorman would stumble over to Alison Bologna until he shook her huge claw like man hands. They are not just man hands they are a HUGE MAN's hands. The kind of guy who moves your piano or delivers a refrigerator to your house. He would quickly return. We would hang with Erin and Dianna until we eventually start a fight with the always condescending prick VB. "Come on Erin and Dianna lets get out of here." They would stay. They are right to do so.

So it looks like Fox 25 and WHDH 7 are in a tie for best party.  The deciding factor is VB. Any party he is at is a party I will not be at.  Sorry Erin. See you there Anne.

quick takes: 7news at 5pm - 11/19/2009 (65 points)

victoria warren - in boston with the latest on the swine flu and swine flu related deaths in massachusetts.  she looks fantastic as usual and her delivery is right on.  she didn't make my "best of" list this week because i had to watch too much friggin' wcvb.  vicky - here's a pile of points make up for it:  (45 whopping big points)

six sticks of explosives in the line painting truck that crashed this morning.  uh, what?

christa delcamp - she looks super pregnant today - and totally hot.  nice black dress and her bump is an upbeat, perfect sphere.  she has the story of the guy who killed and cut up his father...but i really don't hear a word she says.  (30 plump points)

matt lorch - has an update on the healthcare bill in washington.  i love how the republicans suddenly give a shit about the deficit.  (-10 points)

top female boston anchors and reporters for the week ending 11/20/2009

chicks division:

1. frances riveria -7news anchor and host of "the dish"

staff comments:

"She has been stepping up her sexiness since Kim Khazei has joined her on the anchor desk.  Her skin tight dresses make me think I’m getting the news from a Filipino Farrah Fawcett."

"frances is committed to excellence and is consistently one of the best dressed.  the black dress from the other night was a jaw dropper."

2. tie: lisa hughes - wbz anchor

staff comments on lisa hughes:


"She is trusting and comfortable."


"a combination of professionalism, talent and looks that is without peer"


2. tie: j.c. monahan - wcvb eyeopener weather

staff comments on j.c. monahan:
"the black f-me pumps she wore on wednesday are still etched in my mind."

top male boston anchors and reporters for the week ending 11/20/2009

dudes division:

1. pete bouchard - 7news weather

comments from the anchor editorial staff:

"He is a rare bird. A weather dude who is not a total nerd. I’d have a beer with Pete."

"the other day he was describing some changes in a weather system in central mass and let out a guttural "nice!" like a kid scoring a sweet goal in NHL '09."


2. jonathan elias - wbz anchor/reporter

staff comments:

"He is comfortable and not too pushy.  You feel comfortable letting him into your home each night cause he won’t stay long and won’t mess your place up."

"he had a good story on the questionable state house priorities in the final hours of the current legislative session.  also - his chemistry with lisa hughes is excellent." 

3. jack williams - wbz anchor and living legend


staff comments:

"jack's tone is perfect for the heavy hitting story."

quick takes: 7news - 11/20/2009 - 3,575 points

dan hausle/steve cooper - the missing mustache has an exclusive phone interview with the 17 year old driver of the lowell hit and run vehicle. (10 exclusive points)  while she sounds very sorry, i suspect she's not as sorry as she will be.  amazingly enough, the victim is in fair condition and is expected to make a full recovery. (35 points).  something tells me that in this case, "full recovery" means a lifetime of nagging aches and pains, an early hip replacement and unfortunately, a premature death.   well, at least she's sorry.

adam williams - i think that adam is one of those guys who is "friends" with a bunch of hot girls - but has no chance of landing any of them.  so, i guess it's smart to befriend mr. williams.

on a completely unrelated note - adam gets a whopping + 3,500 points for his delightful banter with anne allred on his giving up coffee cold turkey (down from his usual 5 cups) and the description of his headache due to the lack of caffeine.



dylan dreyer -this morning's burnt orange silk blouse is well, 2x perky.  (15 points)

anne allred - this blog loves anne allred - but she today she's dressed like kermit the frog. it ain't easy being green.  (5 points)


nicole oliverio - on the scene in duxbury where a highway line painting truck flipped over after hitting the route 3 guard rail.  disaster is averted as they manage to avoid a massive propane leak.  (+15 points)  oh, nicole - you're fantastic, but you should get some winter coat suggestions from michelle relerford.  your off-white coat looks like a pile of plowed snow mixed with with three days of salt, sand and gravel.  (-5 points)

quick takes: 7news at 6pm - 11/19/2009 (91 points)

victoria block - vicki's at the scene of the drag race hit and run in lowell.  the mother/son witnesses are interesting.  i've seen their interviews on 5 (ugh) and fox 25 as well.  their vivid descriptions include:

* the son thought the airborne victim was laundry until he noticed the legs
* the fact that the boy was hit so hard that it knocked him out of his shoes
* the kid landed on his face (7news ran footage of the place where the victim landed while the son said this)

wow.  how terrible.  good news - the cops found the blue acura that they think did the damage.  bad news - no word on who was driving.

vicki also has interviews with the victim's sister and stepfather.

well, i guess vicki block is good for lowell - as lowell looks attractive in comparison. (15 points and a boost in property values)

christa delcamp - is in the studio with the news that john kerry's daughter was pulled over and subsequently arrested for suspected DWI.   the kerry spokesman says she was pulled over for an expired registration and released after testing under the legal limit for DWI five hours later.  christa looks like a wonderfully ripe little summer plum.    (35 plump points)

janet wu - the good wu is wearing a very flattering kinda camoflage-y wrap top and skirt.  it is impossible for me to describe and make it sound hot - but it totally is.  (35 points)

kim khazei -  k2 says "cat fight".  she also describes a 3/4 court shot by garnett that didn't count as amazing.  larry ridley goes on to to describe it as:  

* a heck-of-a heave-ho.
* nothing but string music
* a straight up swish.

larry ridley - he's totally jerking the script tonight - from start to finish. tonight it's slow and steady...with an occasional pinch at the tip. uh, i guess the ladies might like it...  (6 points?)

bob kraft - gets $9m in federal stimulous money for a footbridge to the paris of the '10s shopping/football/entertainment mecca.   (0 points)


off topic:

ll cool j calling chris o'donnell "G" on the new NCIS is funnier than eveything ice-t says on SVU.